August 19th, 2002

Allah Sulu-South Park

"X" Marks My Ass

Found myself leaving the interstate because of "extensive delays" (I've seen three-hour delays referred to merely as "delays"; so when they add the word "extensive", I get worried) and having to find my way through New Jersey to another highway. I wasn't even being fussy, I just wanted out of New Jersey. Can you blame me? Anyway, I had a mapbook in my car of the entire USA, which I'd just used recently (I was lost in NYC)... But when I searched my car for it, I couldn't find it anywhere. It's not the first time this has happened either; maps in cars have a disturbing tendency to move around and vanish, and I'm sick of buying new ones...

If a map is missing, what do you use to find it?

I found myself wishing that I was one of the gods who could fly, or at least summon a celestial chariot ("What? You don't know Swing Low, Sweet Chariot? What about Camptown Lady?") to whisk me to my destination. I'll have to work on that. At least I'm not lame like Vulcan.

Allah Sulu-South Park

The Name Game

Name Analysis

Your name of Allah creates an idealistic, sensitive nature and a desire for culture and the refinements of life. You would work best in a relaxed environment at tasks involving writing, mathematical, or analytical skills that require concentration. You appear calm to others, but at times you suffer inwardly with nervous tension. You can find it difficult to express your deeper thoughts and feelings verbally. It is much more natural for you to express your deeper thoughts in writing. A lack of positivity and confidence is a source of difficulty in making decisions in business dealings. You are easily offended, and can suffer with moods of depression. You want the best, but lack the confidence and aggressiveness to materialize your desires. Procrastination is a weakness, for so often you are inclined to avoid issues and to leave things undone until the last moment when you are forced to take action. You are inclined to indulge in rich foods that lack proper nourishment. This name creates weaknesses in the heart, the respiratory organs, or the kidneys.

Interesting, and it hits pretty close to the truth on several points. I'm rather amused that someone (who's likely never heard of me, the poor bastard) wrote this about my namesake, the "kill all unbelievers and I'll get you laid in the next life, unless you eat a ham sandwich" dude.