March 20th, 2003

Allah Sulu-South Park

Does This Make Sense To Anyone?

Some people might be getting a little paranoid, thinking that out of the zillions of livejournal accounts, the "government" is going to somehow focus on their anti-Bush writings (as opposed to the thousands of other similar LJs) and think they're a terrorist. Well, not to worry. If the government does decide to comb LJ for potential terrorists, the first people they'll have on the list are people with, say, "jihad" or "allah" in their names. *pause* Some might ask if I'm sweating bullets at that thought. Of course not! (1) I don't take anything seriously, (2) sweating actual bullets would only make me look more dangerous, and (C) I only sweat the purest high-test vodka ... which has its own problems. I can't go downtown in the summer anymore, or I get mobbed by bums trying to lick me. And unlike purplefreak and j_brew, bum-licking is not my bag, baby.
Allah Sulu-South Park

Wouldn't You Rather Just Have A Thousand Words?

Over the many months I've been doing this (LJ), many people have asked me for a real picture of myself (as well as for other personal info). I have occasionally granted those requests, but very seldom and sparingly. However, after circle_k posted his picture, the temptation to post my own in the various allah_sulu accoutrements grew. This poll shows that many of you are for this idea... Then, for fun, I created a second poll to solicit guesses as to my appearance, before the Truth that is Out There is revealed. These results were hidden, both because some people (who've seen me) posted accurate answers, and because I have further plans for them. I've already disqualified the answers from people who know me, but here are some of the comedic answers given by others:

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(The third category of answers, those from people who really did try to guess, will be addressed later...)