The Vodka God (allah_sulu) wrote,
The Vodka God

Vampires Suck.

Here's somebody's list of Top 70 Vampire Movies of All Time, with the usual boldfacing of the ones I've seen, and added commentary:

  1. Bordello of Blood (1996) – This was a "Tales from the Crypt" movie, introduced by the Cryptkeeper. I saw this one in the theater.
  2. Vampire in Brooklyn (1995) – Starring Eddie Murphy. I just saw part of it; I don't remember where, or how much of it.
  3. Dracula 2000 (2000)
  4. Queen of the Damned (2002)
  5. The Forsaken (2001)
  6. Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992) – Saw it in the theater, own the DVD. Q prefers the movie to the series.
  7. The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1974)
  8. Blacula (1972)
  9. Van Helsing (2004) – Yep, wasted good money on this one, too.
  10. Fright Night Part 2 (1988)
  11. Vamp (1986) – Grace Jones doesn't need fangs to be scary. Saw this one on late-night TV a long time ago.
  12. Blade: Trinity (2004) – I own all three of the Blade movies on DVD, and have seen them all, despite the declining quality of each movie from the previous one.
  13. Underworld: Evolution (2006) – I think I own this one and not the first one, although it could be the other way around. Vampires vs. werewolves. Dumb but shiny.
  14. Lifeforce (1985)
  15. The Night Flier (1997)
  16. John Carpenter's Vampires (1998)
  17. Vampyros Lesbos (1970)
  18. Innocent Blood (1992) – I saw this when it came out on video, right after seeing (the original) La Femme Nikita. (Both had the same lead actress.)
  19. Ganja & Hess (1973) – Sounded intriguing until I read the description and found out that "Ganja" is the name of one of the characters.
  20. Subspecies (1991)
  21. Underworld (2003) – A shut-off-your-brains-and watch movie, but still pretty good. Better than the sequel, IIRC.
  22. The Vampire Lovers (1970)
  23. The Hunger (1983) – I own this one, but I've still never watched it. I blame Kate.
  24. The Wisdom of Crocodiles (1998)
  25. Blood for Dracula (1974) AKA Andy Warhol's Dracula – I think this is another one I own (on VHS) but have never gotten around to watching…
  26. The Return of the Vampire (1944)
  27. Son of Dracula (1943)
  28. Frostbitten (2006)
  29. BioHunter (1995)
  30. Vampire's Kiss (1989)
  31. Rabid (1977)
  32. Love at First Bite (1979) – Really? This wasn't made in the 80s? Well, it was the 80s when I saw it.
  33. Nadja (1994)
  34. Blood and Donuts (1995)
  35. Blood: The Last Vampire (2000)
  36. Vampire Effect (2003) AKA The Twins Effect
  37. The Addiction (1995)
  38. John Badham's Dracula (1979) – I think I saw this one, a long time ago.
  39. Night Watch (2004) AKA Nochnoy Dozor
  40. Blade II (2002) – Had to own this one primarily because Danny John-Jules was in it. He played Cat on Red Dwarf; and must have been first in line when the director was looking for actors who were (1) black, (2) British (or at least could pull off a British accent), and (3) knew how to speak while wearing fangs. And then, since I owned the first two, I figured I might as well own all three (although the third one I only saw on video).
  41. Blade (1998) – Very good movie, and didn't really need the sequels.
  42. Vampire Hunter D (1985) – Seen it, own it.
  43. Brides of Dracula (1960)
  44. Dracula's Daughter (1936)
  45. Vampyres (1974)
  46. House of Dracula (1945)
  47. Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001) – Own it, but didn't get too far into it. Wasn't too impressed upon the first attempt at watching it. Probably requires vodka and/or the proper people to watch it with.
  48. The Monster Squad (1987) – "Wolfman's got nards!"
  49. Salem's Lot (1979) – One of many Stephen King novels that lost something on the way to the big screen (before they started to lose something even before getting set to paper).
  50. The Fearless Vampire Killers (1967)
  51. The Last Man on Earth (1964)
  52. From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) – I love Harvey Keitel's character.
  53. The Lost Boys (1987) – Didn't they recently make a sequel to this one? If so, I'll have to make sure I keep avoiding it.
  54. Day Watch (2006) AKA Dnevnoy Dozor
  55. Sundown: The Vampire In Retreat (1991)
  56. Interview with the Vampire (1994) – Whine whine whine… C'mon, Louis, get a death!
  57. Shadow of the Vampire (2000) – Extremely good, except for the poor ferret…
  58. Fright Night (1985)
  59. The Night Stalker (1972) – I don't know if I ever saw the movie, but I vaguely recall seeing the TV series (over 30 years ago) at the very least (some of which we have on VHS, when I want to get around to seeing them again).
  60. Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992) – Seen it.
  61. Cronos (1993)
  62. Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust (2000)
  63. Dracula: Pages from a Virgin's Diary (2002) – "A ballet rendition of Bram Stoker’s gothic novel Dracula" … Wait, what?
  64. Near Dark (1987)
  65. Horror of Dracula (1958) – I'm pretty sure I saw at least one of the old Christopher Lee/Hammer vampire movies, but I have no idea which one(s). Been a looong time.
  66. Martin (1977)
  67. Black Sunday (1960)
  68. Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979)
  69. Dracula (1931)
  70. Nosferatu (1922) – Saw this one in a film class in college.

They also gave an honorable mention to two vampire TV series I've seen, at least in part; Britain's Ultraviolet and Japan's Hellsing.

Tags: anime, geekery, meme, scary
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